The waiting game

“Our willingness to wait reveals the value we place on what we’re waiting for”.

True. And yet, we have increasingly become a society of impatience, carelessness and hurry, meaning waiting is rarely on the agenda, even for the things that really do matter…

Photo: Βethan/ Flickr.

When I was fifteen, all of my friends would talk about sex. They would ask if I’d “done it” like they had while I, the nerdy kid with un-plucked eyebrows and a truly terrible sense of fashion, hadn’t even had a real boyfriend yet, never mind contemplated taking my clothes off. They would gossip about the wild parties they’d been to over the weekend and who they’d hooked up with – something that placed worlds between where my friends were mentally (or where they thought they were), and where I was.

Looking back on those times, I have no regrets. I see that being the reserved kid in the corner trying to piece together all the sex jargon my friends would shout about was actually a blessing; I mean all I knew of 69 was that it’s a composite number, what else?!

Because at that age, it’s easy to think that you know a little something about life. You’ll soon be leaving school, taking your exams, and you’ll even be able to buy a lottery ticket if you want to – yep! You know, all the things that make you feel like you’re really, properly growing up for the first time.

But that’s just it: there’s so much pressure surrounding us to grow up. To ditch the Disney Channel for going out drinking, to pass up the chance to spend time with family in order to see some older guy who seems like a good idea and, most shockingly, to wave goodbye to our innocence ASAP and enter into the big wide world of sex just because our age allows it; I mean come on people, the legal age of sixteen is in place for guidance and safety, not as a challenge to race each other to the post!

I knew at that delicate age I was nowhere near ready to grow up that fast, yet those surrounding me continued to remind me that not drinking alcohol and being a virgin were both factors that made me ‘uncool’. Wrong. So very, very wrong.

You see, time flies far too fast anyway without rushing it along. One minute you’re sitting in your polka dot PJs with a hot chocolate and your favourite teddy on your lap, and the next you’ve got bills to pay, a job to do and a whole life of grown-up things ahead of you.

Why would anyone want to throw any of that precious time away?

Sure, there were many guys whose attention I’ve lost over the years as soon as they realised I’m not the type to hear the words “you’re beautiful” and jump into bed, but if you ask me, attention like that isn’t worth your time anyway.

“Our willingness to wait reveals the value we place on what we’re waiting for”, and through not following the trend set by many of the people I knew throughout my teenage years, I’ve managed to meet some very special people along the way. People who cared about me. People who respected me. And, most importantly, people who liked me for exactly who I am.

I’ve learnt so many valuable lessons from living my life the way I have:

  1. You should never cave into pressure, regardless of who or where the pressure is coming from;
  2. You don’t need to be or do anything to prove your worth to others;
  3. If you want to be with someone who loves you and cares about you for all the right reasons, there’s no rush: you have all the time in the world – use it.

First published on KettleMag: The Waiting Game.
Featured image: Βethan/ Flickr.

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